Hey guys...it's been awhile.

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340john

340john

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Joined
Jan 14, 2005
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Location
Edison, NJ
It's been a long time since I've posted anything. I want to thank everyone for the PM's checking up on me and asking how I have been. Things have not been great and I have been laying low for the last few months. The condition with my legs has gotten worse, I have gone to numerous doctors and taken hundreds of tests all to come back to "I'm sorry, we see that there is muscle disease and degeneration, but we can't seem to fight it...here are some meds for you to try". I am in a deep depression, I have gained 40 pounds, my wife and I haven't been intimate in over a year, I sold the 340 Swinger I owned for 24 years and planed to keep until I died, all I do is sit on the couch and fall asleep. I sold everything I was collecting: all the cars, the parts, the baseball memerobilia collection and my Dukes of Hazzard collections I have been collecting since I was a kid just trying to pay bills...and I can't keep up with them. I feel like I am drownding. I need help but I don't know where to look, I am 42 years old but I feel like I am 80. I have to go down stairs on my *** like a 2 year old, I am starting to slow down and I can't take it. Sorry for ranting, I just needed to get this off my chest and I have said you guys are like family me, even though I have only met a handful of you in preson, I feel like I know you all.
 
Hang in there John, sounds like you are going through hell but you need to stay positive and keep your head up high. You can fight this bullshit, you sound like a very strong man. You can talk with us anytime to BS or vent, what ever you need we are here for you. I will keep you in my prayers and hope for the best!
 
This is easier said then dun John, But I can say first hand that this kind of thing can really turn your ambitions off and I mean completely
I was about your age when I was told about my bone degeneration when a tick bight changed my life........
I have broken 6 bones on my right side in the last ten years and separated my sternum a few time, Limes disease almost killed me but they caught it soon, But it has infected most all of my bones and joints on my right side.
Depression is a hard think to fight, But I have found that a daily schedule helps fight this off some what, wake up shower and shave and look in the mirror and say OK that is dun, take the time to dress and look nice as you can :happy10: Then be smart on what you eat everyday 8) If I am correct your hands and legs start shaking if you use them very much ?
I know it don't seem far for a 42 year old to have to deal with this...
I have found that finding a friend or family member around to talk to and enjoy playing card's, domino's or pool to keep my mind and spirit strong
It's good to see you posting again John, and anytime you want to talk just pm me and we can exchange phone #'s
This site is a life saver for me , stay creative and I hope and pray they get things figured out AND SOON brother.
Think positive and remember all the folks that care and lov ya John :happy10:

Depression is a hard monster to beet and get out of your life.
Fabo is a good med for me 8)
 
Depression is a *****. Anyone who hasn't experienced it or had a close loved one experience it has no idea how dibilitating it can be. Don't forget that it's not you, it's the depression. You're not just tired, it's the depression. You haven't really lost intrest, it's the depression. There are meds that help depression, but many of them change who you are. Like Mike said, a schedule helps, but the most important thing is to realise that it is real and don't give up. Like is hard. Life is not fair, but you already know that. It's not what you have or what happens to you that makes up you life, it's how you respond to it. I'll pray for you, as I'm sure many of your FABO friends and family will, but just remember, you are in control, and you can thrive.
 
You're doing the right thing by reaching out, I can not imagine how difficult your situation is. You are not alone. Don't give up, you can prevail over this. Also remember your wife is your best friend, and this is hard for her too but she knows if she were sick you would be there for her. Our prayers are with you.
 
Sorry to hear about your muscle disease. Keep on fighting, John. You´re in my thoughts.
 
I agree with what has been said here, the only thing I would add is, in my experience one of the best ways to fight depression is through exercise, it releases endorphins which are way more effective than any prescription anti depressant with no negative side effects, if you cant work on your lower body work on your upper body and stamina instead, anything that gets your heart and lungs working harder will help you feel better and even lose some of that 40 lbs you put on, coming home from the gym after a good workout you are going to look at your self and your life differently and so is your wife, and if that isn't reason enough I dont know what is
 
Rant away, John. We're all ears. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers, bud.
 
John,
This is my prayer for you my friend:

Dear Lord,
You know John so much better than I do. You know his sickness and the burden he carries. You also know his heart. Lord, I ask you to be with John now, working in his life. Let your will be done in John's life. If there is a sin that needs to be confessed and forgiven, Lord, please help him to see his need and confess. Lord, I pray for John because your Word says I should pray for his healing. I believe you hear this earnest prayer from my heart and that it is powerful because of your promise. I have faith in you to heal John, but I also trust in the plan you have for his life. Lord, I don't always understand your ways, and why John has to suffer, but I trust you. I ask that you look with mercy and grace toward John. Nourish his spirit and soul in this time of suffering and comfort him with your presence. Let John know you are there with him through this difficulty. And may you be glorified in his life and also in mine.
Amen
 
Sorry to hear about your health problem best thing you can do is get things off your chest. I know its hard but keeping a positive attitude does wonders, some here know what health problems I have faced. I am a walking 5% miracle to survive and not be taking a dirt nap right now.

I know exactly how you feel about the being like a 80 year old I still have good days and bad.

Have the Doctors told you what exactly you are fighting?

You have my best wishes and prayers for getting well.
 
Hi John , rant away , I know where you are coming from , lost the use of my left arm 30 years ago and cysts in my spine took away the use of my legs 4 years ago , been wheel chair bound since . Though I can walk short distances .
Don't give up , you never know what is around the corner , 5 neurosurgeons told me nothing could be done with the cysts in my spine , but I found one that was willing to do the operation and restored some use of my legs , he freaked once he opened me up , but was able to do some good . I can walk a short distance , that is a big improvement
They put me on anti depressants , but I found they made me gain pounds and was suicidal on them , i stopped taking them and that was hard , withdrawal from them was bad . All I can say is find the right solution for you , don't give up , takes a while .
Hope things improve for you , stay strong .
 
John

I don't know you because I just recently joined this great site but my prayers go out to you. I hope you find out what the problem is real soon and can work towards getting better. I used to rehab sports injuries and athletes and I don't know what ailes you but maybe some work on a bicycle or in a pool would be effective it's not weight bearing and can rebuild some of the muscles and fire the nerves. Also there is a type of exercise machine very common to rehab/PT facilities that you sit down in and works by cranking your arms and you can vary the resistance. God bless. As some members have said before trying any kind of exercise will surely brighten your spirits.

Carl
 
Good to here from you John. Sorry to here you are not doing so well. Hang in there. I just know you are going to get better, buy your Dart back and drive off in to the sunset.
 
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