I am really gong through a rough time emotionally and in all areas right now and need someone to tal

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Tom has been through tough times. But he is also lost. He truely needs third party help beyond our support. His life changed when Dee got sick, he lost his house, job, etc. His path and solutions may be clear and simple for us.
Let me just say that Tom has dug deep into our souls, at least mine. He has sold his stuff, musical instruments, cars, parts, had his own surgery, etc. over the course of his wife's illness. Those things can be replaced. The ones who have sought help and recovered from situations, are probably the most shaken by all of this. Tom has been in a tough way since last summer. The stop on in guys have invited him in. But he needs professional third (not involved) party help. We can certainly support, or help him find it. His old address was in Willow Springs, NC 27592, just south of Raleigh. I don't know where he is now, possibly within an hour of Raleigh? He has an email (old For Sale post) and a possible Facebook page. I don't know the daughter's location. If you know the obit date (Delia), I'm guessing around UNC Raleigh, don't know the last name.
 
Clroads said:
Tom has been through tough times. But he is also lost. He truely needs third party help beyond our support. His life changed when Dee got sick, he lost his house, job, etc. His path and solutions may be clear and simple for us.
Let me just say that Tom has dug deep into our souls, at least mine. He has sold his stuff, musical instruments, cars, parts, had his own surgery, etc. over the course of his wife's illness. Those things can be replaced. The ones who have sought help and recovered from situations, are probably the most shaken by all of this. Tom has been in a tough way since last summer. The stop on in guys have invited him in. But he needs professional third (not involved) party help. We can certainly support, or help him find it. His old address was in Willow Springs, NC 27592, just south of Raleigh. I don't know where he is now, possibly within an hour of Raleigh? He has an email (old For Sale post) and a possible Facebook page. I don't know the daughter's location. If you know the obit date (Delia), I'm guessing around UNC Raleigh, don't know the last name.
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You are correct in saying Tom needs professional help...but if he doesn't want it...
 
inkjunkie said:
You are correct in saying Tom needs professional help...but if he doesn't want it...
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We've done all we can do........and then some. I may get flamed for this, but I'm gonna be brutally honest here. I feel a little insulted. How many of us here have donated items to help him, or just donated money?

I realize this was done for Kitty and I as well, and we greatly appreciate it. We are in a better place today too.

But Tom has been nothing but negative. I cannot believe he cannot see the outpouring of love and genuine interest from here on this forum. That right there would be fuel enough for me to at least TRY......and it WAS because we DID and we are where we are today because of it.

You can only do so much. And here Tom is talking about just wanting to die after we've all come together to try and help.......and even a member has reached out and invited him to LIVE with him.

I'm sorry but this whole thing kinda chaps my *** to tell you the truth.

Tom, you need to pull yourself up by your bootstraps and seek professional help like you SAID you would do. We are all here for you and have been for a long time, but we can only do so much.

Remember when I said........you ain't cornered the market on bad things happenin. We all have a bag of rocks to tote around. Sometimes they get heavy and we need a little help, but we gotta keep totin.

We love you man.
 
After reading his comments....don't remember who talked with him over the phone.....couldn't believe what he had to say. While I feel for him....sure this may not sit well with some....would not take the time to call. It is not that I feel I am better than Tom...really don't know how to say this...just not into the pity party. We all have **** we are dealing with. Some people piles are more severe than others...but we all do. We are both disabled. Ernie has 4 different inflammatory type diseases. Needless to say the depression tagging along with it. Meds ain't helping...all my physical crap...bipolar, ptsd, paranoia....daily suicidal thoughts...realization that the future that we both had worked so hard for just ain't gonna happen. But thats life. You HAVE to make the best of it. Only person that can fix YOU is YOU. We sure as hell can't. I get that many of you can't stand me..hell, look at how few responses my threads get. But don't care....pretty obvious Tom has given up...it is what it is
 
I keep plodding along, and argue against myself as to whether I have given up.
Pray I can go with my kids see the Walter P Chrysler museum next weekend.
Hotel reserved, 110 years old in Clinton, MI.
Looks like bad snow and then damn cold.
I would sort of guess most people who feel this way would say they are depressed.
But I would describe it as oppressed.
Maybe it just a bad time for Tom's.
I would have an easier time with losing my wife and best friend through death than coming to the realization she's done everything possible to wreck the boat for 10 or more years....
We can't blame one another for indulging in depths of hopelessness.
Every aspect of the world I built got blown away, and there is no family, just lingering debt and the same endless work that built this hole I'm trapped in.
Whatever the other Tom does, I hope he he's not stubborn about seeking help like I am.
I don't need to be suicidal, I'm an electrician.
 
When I went away to boot camp in the 70's, we had our first night off and I was wondering around the base feeling lonely and lost. It was Christmas Eve. Thought how miserable that was, and what a spot I was in. I stood outside a chapel on Christmas Eve and looked up, reflecting on my loniness. I was hit back with the image of all of the people celebrating Christmas in far worst circumstances and conditions. I have been able the carry the warmth I felt reflected back from the church that night.

I have to travel into the housing authority for work for some of my job, and let's just say it's humbling. Tom1 has no standing on his manufactured homeless conditions. (If you need your truck towed south, etc..) I have truely met the nicest people, grandmothers caring for grandchildren formerly living in abandoned houses, due to mothers on drugs...and the grandchildren are always trying to help me, go figure.

So as an adopted kid standing in front of that church so many years ago, not knowing that the ex was going to take the 3 year old several states away,in ten years, or that twenty years later the ex sister in law would say I was right.

Tom2 you are over doing the Dad thing. My Dad would always help me do the driving, as it was his grandson he was going to see on Christmas. And yes Tom2 - ex's don't always show up for court appointed visits, even on Christmas. Just a heads up

All I can say RRR ( who offered Tom1 an apartment) and Ink Junkie is I understand your disappointment in Tom1.

This probably doesn't seem like Mopar talk, but Chrysler is still sending my mother a check. Also she is getting a check through the VA, and they want to be informed if her status changes or she re-enlists? Life is strange. You guys have all shown Tom1 the warmth. Your the best!
 
I would guess if he is still in the area he may be southeast of Raleigh, maybe near the Johnson County Rest Area of I-95 occasionally, maybe a truck stop to the south. Didn't see Doug indicated daily suicidal thoughts in post 104 above, even before Christmas. Tom had indicated such last summer (drugs and alcohol) on another post.
 
inkjunkie said:
Anybody hear from Tom lately?
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He post today,I guess he is alright and will be posting in this thread soon.
dustermaniac said:
Hello from Modesto California. Left NC 15 days ago and here I am trying to start over.
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dustermaniac said:
We drove by there the other night but it was too dark to see anything. That is in Lathrop CA correct?
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dustermaniac said:
Yes it is but it was very dark. I took an Amtrak all the way here from NC
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I'm encouraged by the fact that he wanted to try to start over in a new location as opposed to dwelling in the negative aspects of his old location! That to me shows a lot of determination not to let his depression get the better of his life, and to put a serious effort into making positive strides towards a new chapter that honors Dee, and himself!! Way to go Tom, you will be in my prayers, I'll switch the line to long distance!! :)
 
Prayers sent for other Tom.
I am holding together by a miracle.
Twelve hour work days of continuous crises help the days go by, but the theft of $43000 when I can't finish paying off family debts has got me in state where I am almost in a panic when I'm not working to dig out.
Each day my breakfast is a half stack of panic-cakes drizzled with oppression.
I refuse to say I am depressed.
Hoping to find enough of my smithereens to put a complete person back together.
 
Tom2 thanks for reaching out to Tom 1 last summer. Tom2., you may need separate threads about the kid's mom, accounting, overwork, denial, dentists and theft. Too many things at once.
 
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