A sailor meets a pirate in a bar. The pirate is sporting a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and an eye patch. "How'd you get the peg leg?" the sailor asks.
"Argh, matey. I got washed overboard one night during a fierce storm. No sooner did I hit the water than the damned whale, Moby Dick, came over and bit off me leg."
"How did you get the hook?"
"We were attacking one of her majesty's ships, and one of them scurvy dogs cut off me hand with his cutlass."
"Well then, how'd you get the eye patch?" the sailor asks.
"One of them flying devils, a damned seagull, sh1t in me eye." the pirate replies.
"Are you telling me, you lost an eye from seagull sh1t?"
"Well, it was me first day with the hook..."
"Argh, matey. I got washed overboard one night during a fierce storm. No sooner did I hit the water than the damned whale, Moby Dick, came over and bit off me leg."
"How did you get the hook?"
"We were attacking one of her majesty's ships, and one of them scurvy dogs cut off me hand with his cutlass."
"Well then, how'd you get the eye patch?" the sailor asks.
"One of them flying devils, a damned seagull, sh1t in me eye." the pirate replies.
"Are you telling me, you lost an eye from seagull sh1t?"
"Well, it was me first day with the hook..."
