I must be a crabby old SOB

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66dartgt

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When I was growing up, and the holidays came we celebrated with just the immediate family, Mom, Dad, my Brother, and maybe a few close friends would visit. Since we have been married (18yrs now), every xmas is a fiasco dealing with the inlaws. I'd rather not. Does that make me a bad guy, or a scrooge of sorts ?

The wife finally figured it out after going through the estate of her parents and dealing with her siblings (3 younger brothers) that they for the most part don't care about her or us. Too bad it had to happen that way but its made our relationship alot stronger. I always knew what was going on but she put a blind eye to it.

Anybody else think about this kind of stuff ?
 
Ah, who needs crappy inlaws when you have the FABO Family!!

Actually I'm lucky, my Inlaws are all great. and yup they Drive Mopars! :headbang:

Sorry to here your not so lucky.
 
66dart,I have been their and done that.And every year it gets worse.One side of the family,wants us for every holiday or event,but are to stupid to figure out that there might be a nother family that just might have the same idea,god forbid that would happen,then the screaming matches start.Got to the piont I told them,the problem side to F*#@ off and if they don,t like it,sit on it and rotate.All of a sudden the next year they are all sweet and when can we make time and sucky,sucky,still tell them to F/O.Xmas is for kids only,period.People want you to buy gifts for other people you do not call or see through the year,like DUH.I see and spend more time with my brother inlaw than i do my three sisters,and only realy talk to one.Some years i do Xmas at one place and new years at the other,then switch,and some times just stay home and they come to me.I find to much B/S at Xmas,to much runnig around and to much kiss *** to peole you do not talk to or see or some times even like.Oh, and you have to spend alot of money on a good gift too in some familys,where as me,you get what you get,take it or leave it.I go a little over board for the little ones(grandchildren) and back off a little on my 2 adult boys,as they need some stuff,but not the world either,Mrmopartech/formerly the canadian scrouge
 
Seen it happen time and time again to friends but I'm one of the lucky ones like Keith that has great inlaws.

Sorry to hear your not but the good thing is it made you and your wife closer. That's worth more than gold.
 
I know what you guys are going through. It's unfortunate that after both of your parents are gone, most siblings split to spend time with their own children (happened to me too). It kinda bothered me the first year after. Then I got to thinking about it, and I think it happens to most familys. Your parents are your most comon bond with your siblings. After I thought about it some more, I don't remember seeing my aunts & uncles coming over very often for the holidays after my Grandparents passed away. Maybe it's the "natural seperatation" for the second time? The first would be you growing up and leaving your parents to start your own family. I wouldn't hold too much resentment towards them, as time heals all of that BS that happens when you sort through an Estate.
 
Bah hum bug, I'm not resentful, mainly just venting a little !

I've steamed about this in the past, and now that the wife finally sees what ive been seeing - I feel much better about things. I do appreciate the support mechanism here.

I guess what I was saying before was that with your immediate family and not the extended family - Ive found the holidays much more enjoyable. We did this on Thanksgiving this year - what a nice enjoyable peaceful day it was.

I have alot of friends that are much closer than most of our blood relatives at least on her side, mine is alot better. I guess family is how you define it - whether blood relations or your close friends.

In any event - Bah hum bug and happy holidays to all !
 
I do a xmas party with my frend's every year,We play music,shoot a littel pool and do a few shot's and alot of beer.everyone is so sinsear and not putting on a face for everyone.We have been doing our xmas party for 23 year's now, And we all have a grate time,
I do not have a problem with my inlaw's and my family consist of 4 brother's and I only see one of thouse yearround,as a child I lived in migrant camp,s and xmas was not a big deal.
but now I can injoy the season of xmas with my two boy's and my grand kid's,
and I dair any stuck up selfish person to pretend to injoy it at my house.
66dartgt I think that you may have some people around you that just need to get a life and find out it feel's better to give than reseve.
66dartgt marry xmas and I do not see a scruwg here. :coffee2:
 
Me and the wife will be home alone on Christmas. Good or bad I wish we had some where to go. My brother and sister live too far away and have in-law plans. My Mom had to move half way acroos the state and we can get everyone there for Christmas until January. Uncles and Aunts are not seen now that my Dad passed away. I guess that is just the way it is. One of these year I am going to take the wife on vacation for Christmas and New Year and be done with it all.
 
66dartgt said:
When I was growing up, and the holidays came we celebrated with just the immediate family, Mom, Dad, my Brother, and maybe a few close friends would visit. Since we have been married (18yrs now), every xmas is a fiasco dealing with the inlaws. I'd rather not. Does that make me a bad guy, or a scrooge of sorts ?

The wife finally figured it out after going through the estate of her parents and dealing with her siblings (3 younger brothers) that they for the most part don't care about her or us. Too bad it had to happen that way but its made our relationship alot stronger. I always knew what was going on but she put a blind eye to it.

Anybody else think about this kind of stuff ?
Click to expand...

Three years ago my Dad died of a heart attack Dec 1st, the year before my sister died, and two years before that, my Mother died of cancer, I know what you have been through, I was the executor of my dad's estate, and everyone was real nice until they got their money, two years later, I have not heard from them since. Understandably, we are all scattered across the country, but at this point I have no idea where my sister or my nieces are, I don't even have a phone number. It may sound cruel to say I really don't care, but I have great friends who do care, and that's enough for me. Cristmas is for sharing with people you give a **** about, not MORONS!
 
I agree... you should spend Christmas with people you like. A while back I convinced my wife that we would by only for the kids. Unfortuantely the kids are now grown up and she spends a couple hundred bucks a piece still and I've given up. At least I've got her to stop buying for EVERYONE! Good thing is I don't have to spend Christmas with either of our families. We spend it with good friends.

I gave up on my family a long time ago.... All I heard was... Why don't you shave that thing off... Don't you think you need a haircut, etc. I finally told them to all FO and now holidays have been great without the family BS.
 
I agree, who needs :violent1: , :poke:, :blackeye: and :boxing: ! It's enough to make you :banghead:! Give the in-laws the :finga: and tell them to kiss your :butthead:! Then, you too, may enjoy :brave: ! Happy Holidays all! Now, where was I... Oh yeah, :read: :iconbigg:
 
Well alrighty then ! I figured I was not on the wrong page, unfortunately or otherwise I see other folks have the same issues. Its the commitments to our relatives made under false pretenses that really grinds my axe.

We have lost my father, my wifes parents, my brother got divorced and moved away all in the last 3 years. It makes holidays an odd time, we dont see my bro's ex, but see his kids, etc. Plus we are still futzing around with the estate on the wifes side, so we have to play nice for a little while longer. Once the estate is completely settled - next year will be a different story.

merry xmas...and hah bum hug or was that bah hum bug!
 
Been there. Agreed ten fold. As far as being crabby, hey now, thats MY title, LOL. Xmas is a holiday that I would be all for having it banned or made illegal, unfortunatly all the department stores would go bankrupt in a year if they didnt have this crappy made up holiday to push thier goods on everyone and that would cost a lot of jobs. So I tolerate it.I also put up with it for the kids. I do not buy gifts for anyone but my children and occasionaly I get a trinket for the wife, but thats it. Happy pagan day to you all.

As a side note, if everyone knew the truth about this particular holiday, I believe far fewer would actually celebrate it. Nothing like a holiday whose origins are in murder and mayhem.
 
My inlaws:
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My wife:
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Family and inlaws, both sides of the...
They could and sometimes they are real pain in the ***...
 
My in laws are in Arkansas and my family are here in Houston. We try to do Christmas here and there ever year. One thing I noticed is one are country folk and the other are city folk. Arkansas is more like a three day party. We eat one big meal together in the afternoon and then who ever has the most left overs is the host to the next meal. Sometimes we eat at 4 or 5 different houses. Here in Houston we eat one meal and may not see each other until a birthday or something like that. Seems to be the difference between the hustle of the city and the relaxed atmosphere of the country folks. My sis in law told me that she has a hard time getting anyone to do anything when it's hunting season. Almost like they're not all that interested in the money....hummm...not like us city dwellers. I know I've become more bah humbug about Christmas. We leave for Arkansas tomarrow and when we get there that always changes for some reason.
As for estates, I really dread those days. My uncle recently had a mild stroke and was near death. Both artires in his neck were serverly blocked. My sister's hubby was on the net trying to figure what his land was worth as soon as he heard. When I was talking to my sis a few days later she couldn't say enough about how much they could use the money. Not even one word about how much she hopes he pulls through the surgery ok. Yeah that pissed me off. I hope him and my mom out live all of us. One can only hope. I seem to remember a time when money wasn't more important than family. And it wasn't that long ago.
 
Update - another venting session -

I hate to be a crank, today my youngest brother in law calls - they cant be troubled to cook tomorrow - although they invited us.

Jeff Foxworthy can chime in any time now - You might be a redneck if - You have KFC for christmas eve. You have to laugh at this.

Is this too funny or what?

We could have had them come here, and we could fix a proper meal, but no - we have to go there (45 miles away) and eat fast food and open presents. If I go we are taking something I will eat. Not that chicken isnt edible, okay for July4th - but xmas ?

Well, we all have our crosses to bear, but our's isnt gonna be long for this world. Next year this isnt happening.

We are going to have an excellent meal xmas day and have good friends visit, these others can go scratch.
 
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