The post office is good on paying insurance.
That depends on luck o' the draw.
In 2017 I sold a camshaft, valve springs, valve stem seals, and lifters to a guy in Finland. It worked out most economical to send the small parts and the cam in separate boxes. All documents were completed correctly and they, along with the address labels, were machine-printed for legibility. These were send via Priority Mail Express International. The small parts arrived in Finland in 7 days. The camshaft disappeared. Post office did their trace and found it had been sent to Ghana (um, because yeah, Ghana…Finland…easy mistake). They said they had to wait for the Ghanaian postal authority to do their own investigation. For some strange reason, they never heard back—probably because the Ghanaian postal authority's investigators are make-believe.
Okeh, fine, somewhere in Ghana somebody's using a custom-ground Slant-6 camshaft as a cricket bat or something.
So USPS sent me their forms № 2855 (insurance claim) and 3533 (postage refund) with instructions to take them to my local post office where the insurance form would be accepted and sent in for processing, and the refund would be issued on the spot.
That's not what happened, though. The counter clerk told me to meet the supervisor at the package pickup, a dutch door (bottom and top halves open separately). The manager came and opened the top half, and I presented the forms. He said "What are these?" I briefly explained. He said "There's no such thing as a postage refund. Postage is never refunded under any circumstances."
I said "Will you please read the letter from USPS? It's right there in the first paragraph." He looked at the letter and said "It doesn't say postage refund." I said "Please look at the first paragraph, it says 'file a request for a postage refund by completing the enclosed Form 3533, Application for Refund, which can be used to request disbursement for Priority Mail Express International refunds. This form must be submitted at your local post office.'" He said "The form itself doesn't say
postage refund, it says 'application for refund of fees, products, and withdrawal of customer accounts'. We don't refund postage. Ever. If you bought insurance on your package, you can file a claim and you might get some money for the lost item, but we don't refund postage" and he tried to close the door in my face. My arm on the door ledge stopped him.
I said (without raising my voice) "Sir, for god's sake, please read the letter, it's right there in black and white." He responded by threatening to call the cops and have them haul me away for causing a disturbance. I said "We both know I'm not causing a disturbance. Since you won't honor the form, may I please know your name?" He said "No, you're not getting my name. Get your arm off the door ledge or I'm calling the police and having you banned from this post office. We're done here." I said "Sir, no, we really aren't. If you haven't encountered this form before, that's fine, but it is a USPS form, and it's got a USPS cover letter, and I'd like you to please check with whoever you need to check with about it."
He said "I never heard of it. My head clerk never heard of it. Are you slow? How many times do I have to tell you? WE DO NOT REFUND POSTAGE EVER. Now, is that clear, or do I need to make sure your insurance claim never gets processed?"
Dude's unhinged. I said "You're ordering me to leave, I'll leave, but I do need your name, please." He said "Dave." I said "Dave…?" He laughed and said "You're not gettin' my last name. Get your arm off the door ledge NOW." I said "I don't need your last name, how about your employee number?" He laughed again and said "Boy, you must really want me to call the cops and have you dragged outta here in handcuffs. NO, YOU CANNOT HAVE MY EMPLOYEE NUMBER!" and slammed the door.
I drove to a post office in the next ZIP code and they processed the forms and handed me the postage refund in about three minutes. Amazingly, the forms were really actually real things that really exist and mean what they say after all!
I wasn't done. I called the USPS International Research Group who had sent me the insurance and refund forms, told them what happened at the first post office, and the IRG clerk said she'd have a supervisor call that post office and then get back to me.
No getback was forthcoming, so I called IRG again. Clerk said he didn't know anything about a supervisor calling local post offices, but that I should contact the Consumer Affairs office. So I did, gave a description of events, and they said someone would call me back.
Couple hours later I got a callback: the station manager at the post office where supervisor Dave threatened me would be happy to meet with me there at 2pm to get it all taken care of.
Station manager turned out to be a cool lady with long hair, ink, and rings everywhere. And me with my tusk, we're getting somewhere already. Went in her office and had a really excellent talk with lots of smiling and laughing. She apologized right off the bat for Dave's tantrum; I thanked her and told her I was sorry she was put in the position of having to apologize for someone else's behaviour, which is never any fun.
She said, just the day before she'd seen and heard Dave mistreating another customer and had to step in, order Dave away from the counter, and help the customer herself. "Wow," I said. "I mean, I guess he must've been having a really bad day, and I don't usually wish that on anyone, but at the same time…!". She said "Nnnno, he wasn't having a bad day. His people skills are…well…".
I said "Oh. Well, I'm thinking maybe not so much with the customer contact for Dave." She said "I'm thinking maybe not so much with the Dave."
She told me it was her second day at that post office, so cross our fingers that her administrative permissions were up and working, took my insurance form and me back out to the service desk and had the clerk enter the info and prep the money order, then typed in her auth code, stepped back and crossed her fingers. Code accepted, money order issued:
bling, blong.
I had another cam ground, sent it, and it arrived in Finland in 7 days. Nine months later, the first camshaft landed on my own doorstep in fine condition with no explanation.
Now, I ship a
lot of boxes every year. And even despite a story like this one once in awhile, overall I've still had a whole lot better results with the US Postal Service than with FedUPS. I am pretty sure the only honest thing about UPS is that ѕhit-brown colour on their trucks and logos, kind of a truth-in-advertising thing.
