Sorry Guys I neet to Vent my Girlfriend Problems

-
Parents remember what it's like to be a teen , but teens have no idea how it is to be raising teens :tongue5: .

In the meantime , take the advice of these fellows ...
[ame="http://youtu.be/Aa5XLny8Wmc"]302 Found[/ame]
 
For the record, I've suffered with depression for years so don't think this is coming from someone that is any different with the exception of years.
You're 17. She's 16. Life at this point for you guys is school and maybe a part time job. Sit back and relax because real life's gonna suck a lot more. Chances are, you are both learning experiences for each other. Nothing happens by chance, we don't meet or ge touched by people by accident. But not every woman you get attached to will be right, or lastm or even happen at all. So get the hell over the self imposed pressure. Man up and make a decision. Her parents don't trust you. You can play thier game, and prove tham wrong, and be the man she wants, or you can say goodbye, spend more time with the car cruising, and find a new interest who maybe suits who you are better. You are the key. From experience, daram calls to drama, and you're being too dramatic.
 
Whats the rush ???? Ever heard the term, "Respect your elders "? The girl lives under their roof . You should respect her parents decisions. Plain and simple. Sorry its not what you want to hear.
 
Wow, this is a pretty long thread for such an issue. The simple fact is, you're too old for her. PERIOD. In a few years when she's over 18 years old, if you still have the same feelings for her, and she for you, then great! Until then you're simply asking for trouble.

You're asking to date a girl that will be legally too young for you.
You're asking her to do something her parents are against. Do you want to be a wedge between her and her parents.
Do you really want to force her to decide between you and her parents?
That never ends well, not ever.

You're a victim of bad timing. I raised 2 boys and a girl (who is now 25 years old), and to be honest with you, there is nothing I wouldn't have done to keep my daughter from dating a boy 18 years or older, when she was 15 or 16. NOTHING!

You need to get past this, and simply wait it out. Issues of the heart are the hardest thing to get past, but it's something both of you need to do, for now.

Good luck.
 
hemitheus said:
SOme parents, like my exwife, are control freaks. The sad thing is there isnt much you can do about it... especially since youre only 8 years old. LOL Joking aside. With parents like hers you may wanna keep that pistol holstered or you may wind up with her parents doing after you. the last thing you want is a sex with a minor charge and have to register as a sex offender for the rest of your life... creepy but it happens.

Best of luck to you man. Ive been there.
Click to expand...


That actually happened to someone at my school, he came from Colorado to Indiana, and one of the people in our school said they saw him on one of those websites.
 
As a parent too and a young man at one point in my life, before I give my 2 cents- I have to agree with most that's been posted on here about respect.

I met my wife when she was 17- We weren't allowed to go on dates, hold hands, no physical contact. .. until we got engaged. This may sound VERY EXTREME to most but, I was wild before and She wasn't. I was her 1st and only boyfriend- (no she's not a dog either- but a good looking 5'7 auburn haired babe) I jumped through hoops because I loved her. I figured if I'm planning on spending my life with her then what's 3 years of hoops and sacrifice? They (her parents) made sure that I was out of debt, has a good job to support us (if she didn't work- she did) and just wanted to get to know ME. I ended up marrying my best (female) friend.

Dude, even if it didn't work out. I found out what kind of man I was.
I worked 2 jobs to get out of debt and start a nice nest egg for us ($15K). Took all of 8 months.
Get over the "instant gratification" (I'm not talking sex). Take your time- your very young. Yes, it sucks and I'll be the first to admit that I was at times- pissed, depressed, and hung my head and moped around. But, if you truly care for her, give it time , give respect to the mom even if she doesn't deserve it. You'll be amazed at the strenght you'll have in the end to accomplish things in life. Also- you get to know one another w/o the sex thing being in the way.
It's not an easy road but nothing worthwhile ever is.
BTW- I'll be married 13 years now.
Good luck!
 
This will sound cruel, but I say ditch her. She's 16 and not worth the trouble in YOUR life right now. You're going on 18 and you need to think about YOUR future. Start thinking about college/work or whatever your career goals are. I guarantee it won't be the last girl you speak to. Sometimes the situation just isn't right. In your case, it stinks. In your GF's case, it sucks just as much. The controlling nature of her mother is only going to stress your relationship further and no good will come from it. You two should go your separate ways and get a jump start on life. Sorry for going against the grain here. I'm not going to tell you what you want to hear, I'm going to tell what you NEED to hear.
 
In some states , 16 is their recognised age of consent .

Now by stating this , I'm not endorsing this legality ; just a statement .

When I was in my early 20's , I was dating gals whom were 17-19 years old .
"dating" being the key word here ; nothing serious , just a good time ( no , not -that- good time ! ) .
The funny thing is , all (a small handful ) of these gals were very mature for their age(s) ; highly intelligent , open-minded , not the least bit bimbos .
They picked-up on me ( I used to be thin , with long auburn hair in a Mod style ) , I never trolled for them .

When I was 29-30 , I was dating a gal whom was 19 ; this time there were "adult activities" going on .

Now that I'm 41 , overweight , balding , and in bad physical health , the whole dating thing just kinda vanished ...
... whatever .
I'd rather spend what little coin I have on my car than on some gal who's my age , with kids , and is self-conscious about her looks ( what do you mean that you're too old to wear patent leather kinky boots and an a-line micro-mini ???? HA ! ) .

Enjoy your youth . I certainly miss mine !
 
/6 Matt said:
And that small section right there sums exactly what your problem is. You've had nothing but heartache and completely meaningless and unfullfilling relationships your entire life and each and everyone failed. Now you're walling in self pitty blaming it on the womens fault when it's probably your own. I'm glad you've had all the girls and these one night stands, good for you. But just because you're a sleaze who can't respect woman and has faced nothing but failure in your love life doesn't mean that I am too and that my relationship is doomed to fail.
Click to expand...


See, you think you have it all figured out but in reality you don't have a clue. You don't have a clue about what life is about or what it's like son. I raised 3 boys, the youngest is now 21, they are all successful, well adjusted and now in long term stable relationships. But those relationships didn't start at 16 or 17. I know some long term relationships start that young. My wife (that I dated for 5 years and have been married to now for 20 years was 17 when I met her. I was 28. Her parents absolutely love me. Why? Because I'm patient, understanding and willing to go the extra mile to do what ever it takes.

You are impatient, unwilling to comprehend the situation and her parents wishes. You talk like this relationship is the only thing that matters in the world and that is creepy dude, obsessive and creepy. You have a lot of growing up to do, neither you nor her are adults or even mature enough yet to know what is best, get over it you're both still pups. One day you'll find this out, the hard way obviously because you won't take anybody elses advice, you know it all don't ya.

Cudaspaz couldn't be more right when he said you should never base your happiness on someone else. That sets up the relationship for failure, it will be doomed.
 
Geeezzz you act as if she is the last girl on the planet... grab a hold of yourself man! Slow your roll bro! You have mentioned she is "a keeper"... this leads me to believe that you're already thinking engagement or don't want to lose her (really in love)maybe?

Your young and should be dating.... that's good but right now is the time you to start thinking about what are going to do in life. Get a job (if you don't have one) and start a savings account, plan for college, etc... you know the drill.

Listen...... I pissed away a education (college) because I put more into girls and partying. I found myself in construction and construction life is hard on a man ... believe me. Try to balance your life where you can date, have fun BUT hit those books man! The girls will come later when they can see the nice job you have, money in your pocket and a man with ambition.
 
Well here's my opinion,
After reading this whole thread of good advice and some not so good this is how i see it.
I think the problem is you.(sorry) They(her parents) are just doing there job of protecting they're girl until she is of age.Your the one that is having a hard time with them trusting her.
Your depression and addition to pot is NOT they're problem its YOURS.You have to deal with it and move on.How are you going to start a healthy realationship with her when your house isnt clean.
Saying you cant live without her(in so many words) your nuts you've dated her for 3months YOU DONT KNOW THIS GIRL!!!
i dont understand why you dont give a ratts *** if her parents dont trust you?
wouldn't it be good if everyone trusted each other.
Have you told her parents that you have no interest in sex? They prbly wont believe you but its worth a shot....your a rare one at 17 and not having interest in sex is hard to believe....not out of the question...but unlikely!
Lastly STOP trying to make decisions for her parents and how much trust they should have for her!!!! Just a couple of years ago they didnt trust that lunch money was gonna make it to school....now a boy comes along!!!
Put yourself in they're shoes and stop making it about you!!
 
mullinax95 said:
Geeezzz you act as if she is the last girl on the planet... grab a hold of yourself man! Slow your roll bro! You have mentioned she is "a keeper"... this leads me to believe that you're already thinking engagement or don't want to lose her (really in love)maybe?

Your young and should be dating.... that's good but right now is the time you to start thinking about what are going to do in life. Get a job (if you don't have one) and start a savings account, plan for college, etc... you know the drill.

Listen...... I pissed away a education (college) because I put more into girls and partying. I found myself in construction and construction life is hard on a man ... believe me. Try to balance your life where you can date, have fun BUT hit those books man! The girls will come later when they can see the nice job you have, money in your pocket and a man with ambition.
Click to expand...

=D>=D>=D> Well said!!
 
momoparman said:
Keep jacking it.
Click to expand...

Best birth control I've ever found. 100% effective 100% percent of the time.

daredevil said:
I have a 17 yo daughter whos a straight a student and I cut her a lot of slack to spend time with her boyfriend. I see it as this. She has her priorities straight and is preparing herself for a good future.Until she acts immature or quits taking care of buisness I have to let her lead her own life. Otherwise she will resent me.
Click to expand...

Now see, she's in the same boat, only you seem to have enough sense with your parenting to see what's right for your daughter. She's a straight A student with a bright future who's begining to resent and pull away from her parents to carve her own path and if they don't start letting her make decisions for herseld, it will be the wrong path.

cosgig said:
I worry about the comment you made about giving up a pot habit for her, does that mean that if you lose her you will go back to the pot to soak up your sorrow?? Until you take charge of your own life and make some of these kind of important decisions for yourself and not someone else, you will be fighting a losing battle against the world of choices. Make the choices that are best for you, and I trust that they will be the best for your relationship with her as well. Good luck bro, I know it ain't easy being in this position, but these are the paving blocks to the road of responsible adulthood!!! Geof
Click to expand...

Before I met her I was a straight a student who smoked pot. I quit because she wanted me to and I respected that. If she leaves I will likely go back to it, NOT to soak up my sorrow but because I NEVER wanted to quit in the first place and I wouldn't have if she hadn't wanted me to.

66cuda said:
/6.... I agree be happy about the TIME YOU DO HAVE..... I also think, that at 17 goin on 18 you may think this is the ONE....you may think you are in it for the "long haul" and all the groovy stuff..... trouble is YOU have kinda blown holes in your own point!! let me give you an example: you say you are in it for the "long haul" however, you have only been around for 3 months, which in the grand scheme of things is a single BLIP on the radar screen, a mere second in a full lifetime.....my point being IF 3 months disturbs you, what will 3 years bring? or 10 years? YOU are not patient enough to handle 3 months, how can you possibly say "you are in it for the long haul" BY YOUR OWN description YOU HAVE ZERO IDEA WHAT THE LONG HAUL ACTUALLY IS!!!
I get that you are lonely, I get that you are depressed.....I also KNOW that finding someone WHILE you are depressed, is likely the worst situation you could ever embark upon...... First OFF SHE DOES NOT NEED YOUR BAGGAGE, YOU have not come to grips with your own baggage, involving her is NOT FAIR TO HER and SHE is not a SOLUTION to your issues!! Her parent will likely NEVER "cut the cord" as you would like it and eventually you are going to be so pissed that you will cause grief and drama about it to a point where SHE WILL FEEL TRAPPED BETWEEN YOU AND HER PARENTS....this is not a place or choice you ever want to put on her....Take the high road! get your own **** together, come to grips with your issues and get past them, get good grades in school, continue with school and get an advanced degree......what I am saying is POSITION YOURSELF SO THAT WOMEN AND PARENTS WILL SEE YOU AS A "PRIZE" vs an 18 YO kid that is possibly hunting their 16 yo daughter..... she is 16, she is not an adult, and as long as she is living under Mommy & Daddy's roof, YOU GOT JACK! they are in control and to them YOU are little more than a nuisance that they must deal with for the time being.

Honestly I am NOT trying to diss you......I have been alive for quite a while and I said similar things when I was in my teens....those girls parents HATED me and I had done nothing to deserve it OTHER THAN be a slightly older guy that was interested in their daughter.....that was it!!! THE SITUATION NEVER IMPROVED..... I eventually got tired of being monitored and started lookin at other options....I did not look at the freshmen either...TOOO young!!! I started lookin at girls my own age, THEY already HAD established freedoms, they had already overcome ultimate restrictions...BECAUSE THEY WERE ADULTS!!!! YOU are dating a kid...in nicer terms A NON ADULT...you will never get her parents to look upon her as an adult WHEN SHE ISNT AN ADULT!!! THAT is a foolhardy goal, because untiul she IS an adult and likely well past 18, her parents sound like they will KEEP control until SHE breaks free of it and that aint happenin at 16

quit killin yourself, enjoy what time you do get and open your eyes to your options!

good luck!!
Click to expand...
I see good points and bad points in this, right now it's too early in the morning to respond to all that though. I'll look at it again later today when I can think straighter.
 
have you tried going out to dinner with just her parents? I don't mean like to make a deal or anything just to get to know you better. Treating them to dinner would be an even better Idea.
I am 16 and my girlfriend lives far away too. I get to see her once a monthish. the only reason it remotely works out is from trust on both sides and the fact I can fly a plane there helps a whole lot. So far a year and some change and thats just been since it was official. I only keep track of the years
One more thing, stop saying you don't want sex. I am a faithful Christian and I want sex but I am waiting for marriage. It doesn't change that I don't want it or don't think about it. I can just control it.
 
/6 Matt said:
Now see, she's in the same boat, only you seem to have enough sense with your parenting to see what's right for your daughter. She's a straight A student with a bright future who's begining to resent and pull away from her parents to carve her own path and if they don't start letting her make decisions for herseld, it will be the wrong path.



Before I met her I was a straight a student who smoked pot. I quit because she wanted me to and I respected that. If she leaves I will likely go back to it, NOT to soak up my sorrow but because I NEVER wanted to quit in the first place and I wouldn't have if she hadn't wanted me to.

I see good points and bad points in this, right now it's too early in the morning to respond to all that though. I'll look at it again later today when I can think straighter.
Click to expand...


Haha, man have you got a tough road ahead of you. You are already giving up things you don't want to give up for her, that will come back to haunt you and her in the form of resentment, then comes bitterness, that right there is the death knell.

Now since you seem to know how her parents should be treating her I suggest you get with the program, You march right up to her mom and tell her how she should let her make her own decisions and that if she wants to spend time alone with you she should be allowed. Assert your authority as a boyfriend of the incredibly long time of 3 months to have control of that relationship. Be an alpha male and assert your dominance! Mom's love that. Let us know how that works out for you.
 
First of all practice getting it done in 2 to 3 minutes, that is known as a "quicky". That ability can come in very handy in the driveway. Bribe the little sister with money. Keep an eye on her too she may grow up to be hot. Grow your hair longer, gey a Harley Ferguson,(a loud one) Squeel the tires when leave her house. Follow the Father and see if he is getting anything on the side, this will give you leverage.

On the serious side changing who your are and things that you do at 17 for a 16 year old girl is just not right. You may tyhink this is the love of your life and it may very well work out that way but I doubt it. Your almost 18, the best times of your life,go live it,have fun. Explore discover,experiment(moderation).
Most of the old farts here like me would give their left nut to be your age again.
Best of luck,tap er light.
 
gunship said:
have you tried going out to dinner with just her parents? I don't mean like to make a deal or anything just to get to know you better. Treating them to dinner would be an even better Idea.
I am 16 and my girlfriend lives far away too. I get to see her once a monthish. the only reason it remotely works out is from trust on both sides and the fact I can fly a plane there helps a whole lot. So far a year and some change and thats just been since it was official. I only keep track of the years
One more thing, stop saying you don't want sex. I am a faithful Christian and I want sex but I am waiting for marriage. It doesn't change that I don't want it or don't think about it. I can just control it.
Click to expand...

your right on the money i am a faithfull christian as well and its been 4 yrs with my girl and we still havnt done it because we are waiting for marriage
 
You know it may seem a royal pain in the *** but by keeping you 2 in tow and under watch it may keep your *** out of jail. She is 16 and you are 18? Federal law prohibits sex with under-aged persons, of which she obviously is one.... So, grin and bear it. If you 2 are meant for each other the relationship will weather the storm and you will both be better for it. If not count yourself lucky and move on.
 
Guitar Jones said:
Now since you seem to know how her parents should be treating her I suggest you get with the program, You march right up to her mom and tell her how she should let her make her own decisions and that if she wants to spend time alone with you she should be allowed. Assert your authority as a boyfriend of the incredibly long time of 3 months to have control of that relationship. Be an alpha male and assert your dominance! Mom's love that. Let us know how that works out for you.
Click to expand...

:sign5:
 
Best thing for you to do is move on. 16 will get you 20,really think about that.
Summer is right around the corner, bikinis and barbeques. Get out there and get yourself an 18 yr old, better yet get you a 20 yr old.

Learn what life really is about. One day you will look back at this and laugh.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
-

Back
Top