Questions to ponder..........

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gdrill

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If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is
it considered rape or
shoplifting?
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Can you cry under water?
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How important does a person have to be before
they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
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Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...
but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that
extra penny going to?
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Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing
the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
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Why does a round pizza come in a square box ?
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What disease did cured ham actually have?
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How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out
it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
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Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
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If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
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Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
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Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
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Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
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Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
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Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat ?
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If Jimmy cracked corn and no one cares, why
is there a stupid song about him?
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Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
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If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a
coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
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Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!
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If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all
that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
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If corn oil is made from corn,
and vegetable oil is made from vegetables,
what is baby oil made from?
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If electricity comes from electrons,
does morality come from morons?
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Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle
Little Star have the same tune?
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Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
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Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside
the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ***?
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Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face,
he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride,
he sticks his head out the window?

:dontknow:
 
I get similar questions in PMs. "Hey Doc' Can you tell me how to remove my daughters tosels ?" OK that's an abstract example .
I can't ponder or attempt to answer those kind of questions. Life's too short.
 
Mysteries of the universe, every one.

Probably the same thing that made 200 of my pals say "I want one!!!" and then never look at the thread again.
 
11 is pronounced eleven not onety-one because..............................................................




it's an immature number..................................................................................



it hasn't gone through the teens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
How come when you dig a hole in the ground, the dirt that came OUT of the hole is never the exact right amount to go back IN the hole?
 
Not possible. Too busy howling at the moon and can't really grip the shovel with my hairy palms.

You know that's bogus.... If you're to the point where you got the hairy palms, you should have some wicked Gorilla Grip to hold on to that shovel.

Didn't anybody ever tell you, you'll go blind if you keep that up.
 
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